Forget The Stench, Plant Your Face In The Trench!

Now that it’s happened not once but twice, the MTA should create a public service campaign to educate riders about how best to survive a fall from the subway platform:

A Brooklyn man narrowly escaped death yesterday when he fell onto the subway tracks in midtown Manhattan but managed to scurry to safety as the train roared into the station.

Scraped and bloody, his arms covered with dirt, Paul Torres, 46, was carried out of the 34th St. station about 10:40 a.m. by police officers and firefighters who pulled him from under the stopped train.

Later, wearing a neck brace and awaiting further treatment in the Bellevue Hospital emergency room, a dazed Torres said it was “unbelievable” that he was even alive.

Torres said he couldn’t recall how he fell off the southbound platform of the station and into the path of a No. 2 train, but he confirmed in one word how happy he was to be alive. “Yes,” he said, his head still bleeding from the incident.

As in a thrilling subway rescue two months ago, Torres positioned his body between the tracks, allowing space for the train to pass overhead.

Alternative slogan: “If You’ve Got A Small Enough Ass, Get Between Those Tracks.”