How Not To Escape The Cops

People learn nothing from other attempts at riding the exterior of a train on the ACE line in an unorthodox fashion:

A knife-wielding robbery suspect tried to flee police in a lower Manhattan subway station by leaping onto a moving train — but ended up falling under its wheels, officials said.

. . .

The cops halted one train pulling into the station, but the suspect then tried to hop onto a moving E train that was just leaving, police said.

Investigators believe [the suspect] slipped as he tried to leap into the space between cars — and fell under the train.

[The suspect] died at New York Downtown Hospital a short time later, officials said.

And Your Mayor Wants More Of These Things . . .

Trees, what are they good for?:

A woman was killed when a tree fell on a vehicle about 6:50 p.m. on Grand Central Parkway near Jewel Avenue in Queens. The police said the woman had pulled her car to the side of the parkway, possibly to avoid the storm.

The police could not immediately provide the victim’s name. They said they believed she was alone, but that was not entirely clear because the tree was on the car.

And Sometimes The Strategy Goes Horribly Wrong

This is not why you cook books:

Responding to the ongoing Voice series “NYPD Tapes,” Hernandez reveals publicly for the first time that the downgrading of crimes to manipulate statistics allowed a man to commit six sexual assaults in a Washington Heights neighborhood in 2002 before he was finally caught after his seventh attack.

The initial six crimes, committed over a two-month period, went unnoticed by 33rd Precinct detectives, Hernandez says, because patrol supervisors had improperly labeled most of them as misdemeanors. It was only through a lucky break — an alert neighbor spotted the suspect pushing his seventh victim into her apartment — that the rapist, Daryl Thomas, was finally captured.

The Greatest Third Term Ever!

No sarcastic tone here, except which to say that it should depress anyone to see a mayor stooping this low to attract an NBA free agent, even if that free agent is King James:

On Thursday, Mayor Michael R. Bloomberg released his own appeal to Mr. James: a 49-second pitch in which he cited Clyde Frazier and Willis Reed and beseeched Mr. James to “come write the next chapter in N.Y.C. basketball history.”

The somewhat stilted video — the mayor looks as if he has never held, let alone shot, a basketball before — is part of a media blitz that will eventually include a Facebook page, a live Twitter feed, professionally silk-screened “C’mon LeBron” T-shirts, digital messages in Times Square (and in taxicabs), even fan kits available for download on the Internet.

And that’s what we got rid of term limits for.

Please LeBron, stay in Cleveland . . . at least there they’ll give a fuck about you.

When Walls Blanket, And Cakes Condense

I don’t know what it means, but it sounds vile:

A reporter — this lucky devil — hit the restroom on Wednesday, but actually was on the receiving end of the blow: a “wall of smell” that blankets users in a uriny coating.

. . .

The stench gets worse when you enter the men’s room and are greeted by a quarter inch of fetid standing water that smells like pond scum. The toilet was backed up, forcing many users to shun the stall in favor of the urinal, caked in a residue of condensation.

Location Scout: McCarren Park.