New York City: Where Real Estate Closings Resemble Episode Three Of Jersey Shore

Which Episode Three? That shouldn’t matter:

“A lot of people in this city have gotten what they want by being emotional.”

Naked Man Has Cheap Rent

Daily Intel is wrong — the coolest part about the New York Post article about the cheapest rent-controlled apartments in the city isn’t the gay marriage angle but rather that one of the two guys profiled, who only pays $71.23 a month for a 500-square-foot one-bedroom apartment in SoHo, can make his monthly rent from less than four hours of nude modeling:

[The 87-year-old retired military meteorologist], a published poet who was friends with William Carlos Williams, currently lives off an Air Force pension of $1,100 a month, according to court papers.

And he told The Post he earns extra money as a nude model for painting students, earning $18.50 an hour.

“They tell me I’m so good at it, I feel I have a duty to do it,” he said. “I have an interesting face.”

Two Grown-Ass Adults With Two-Hundred Fifty-Seven And-A-Half Square Feet Each

And then you’re like, Why?:

Even fifth-floor walk-ups in the Village are commanding top dollar, she said, pointing to a 515-square-foot two-bedroom that recently rented for $3,195 a month. “It was an all-time high for that building and that floor,” she said. “But for two people splitting it, it’s about $1,600 a month, and relatively speaking for Manhattan, that’s affordable for living in a great neighborhood.”

Stuff New York Magazine Likes: Museum Renovations

Not that the Museum of the Moving Image isn’t a great cultural resource but arguing there’s a causal link between its recent renovation and an influx of condos with crystallized glass countertops seems like a stretch, even if you do avoid using the word “influx” because it’s one of those hugely overused flabby terms:

Sometimes, it takes a museum — or, rather, the much-hyped renovation of one — to retrain the spotlight on a neighborhood.

We’ll Keep Those Fond Memories Of Miss Brooklyn In A Special Place Close To Our Hearts . . . Right Alongside The Scars From The Eminent Domain Abuse And The Heartburn That Followed Once You Finally Realized That Your Children Actually Might Grow Up Rooting For The Nets

In an SEC filing, Atlantic Yards developers admit that the big project that will reshape downtown Brooklyn may never pan out, meaning that all the project would amount to would be one lousy arena — no low-income housing, no Miss Brooklyn tower and little economic benefit, because sports arenas don’t easily recoup a $300 million public investment:

Documents filed last week with the Securities and Exchange Commission by developer Bruce Ratner and his Forest City Enterprises warn that the non-arena portions of the plan could experience “further delays” leading to most or all of the rest of the 22-acre, $4.9 million project being scrapped.

Location Scout: Atlantic Yards.