The Conquistador-Lost Cities Of Gold Headlines Write Themselves

Then again, I never really understood what bumper cars had to do with lost cities of gold:

This may be your last summer to bump your a– off in Coney Island.

Developer Joe Sitt is considering closing Surf Avenue’s Eldorado Auto Skooter after buying the property from longtime owner Sheila Fitlin earlier this month, but plans are in motion to make sure that the classic Surf Avenue electric bumper car ride — whose famed pink sign told visitors to “bump your ass off” — will remain open for one more season.

Location Scout: Coney Island Amusement Core.

Scenes From The Final Days Of Peep World

Good reporting highlights the salient details:

All Peep World DVDs were being sold for $5, except bestiality DVDs — those were $10.

Always Be Skeptical Of People Who Say Stuff Like “This Is The Sort Of Thing That’s Never Been Tried In NYC”

Because “NYC” is big enough that if someone wanted to try to do something, they probably would have long since tried to do it. I guess it’s sort of like the inverse of “If I can make it there, I’ll make it anywhere”:

It sounds like a scene straight out of Las Vegas or Orlando: streets magically illuminated by an interactive light show, complete with 3-D effects and lights that respond to kinetic pedestrian motion.

But this futuristic vision is being pitched for button-down Lower Manhattan; the city Economic Development Corporation is now accepting bids for a lighting initiative that, according to the request for proposals, “will transform the experience of Lower Manhattan at night.”

“This is the sort of thing that’s never been tried in N.Y.C.,” said Seth W. Pinsky, president of the Economic Development Corporation, which will accept proposals until the end of February. He said the displays would serve locals and visitors alike in promoting a rapidly developing area that too many tourists overlook, especially after business hours.

They Spoke Up About Gentrification But No One Listened . . . Until They Voiced Those Concerns In A Dying Medium Perfectly Suited To The Gentrifiers Themselves

A case study in “knowing your audience”:

They saw abandoned brownstones renovated, cracks on sidewalks fixed and new families move onto their Harlem blocks.

They witnessed swanky, new restaurants open up — and they watched helplessly as the cost of housing shot through the roof.

Four Harlem natives watched the gentrification of their neighborhoods unfold, and now they’ve written a play about it.

The playwrights — all in their early 20s — have mixed feelings about the new businesses, towering new luxury apartment buildings and new faces in Harlem, and just want to see the rich culture of their neighborhoods preserved.

. . .

The play, which focuses on three young women dealing with the affects of their changing neighborhood, is in its final week-long run at the historic National Black Theatre and runs Friday through Dec. 11.

Is it also an example of irony? It’s too early in the morning for me to tell . . .

That’s How You Weave A Narrative!

The Daily News makes it sound like the grant money is going to fight gentrification itself:

A local Brooklyn Latino organization wants to help long-time residents take back the community before hipsters and their trendy bars and overpriced clothing stores wipe out the area’s Latino culture for good.

“When you wake up one morning and you see the corner bodega is now replaced by a fancy cafe or restaurant and you see your neighbors being pushed out because they can no longer afford the rent, all of a sudden you’ve lost your friends,” said [the] head of El Puente. “You begin to wonder, ‘Am I next?'”

El Puente (The Bridge) has landed more than $2.8 million in federal, city and private grant money for its Green Light District project to send swarms of volunteers door-to-door in the next 10 years to help Latino residents get healthier, more educated and more cultured.

. . .

Though Southside remains largely Latino, hipsters from Williamsburg are encroaching quickly.

“We want to spark the Latino community to take back their community,” [the El Puente head] said.